With nearly 20 years of helping the kink community under My belt, I felt the need to speak up last week. In the first part of My blog into kink volunteerism, I examined the noble intentions behind volunteering and its potential to create positive change in communities. I also broke down the darker side of … [Tell me more…]
At the start of 2024, I set out to tick off 40 items as I turned 40. How many kinky items did I get to? Just ONE. I’m going to ignore all the things My recovering perfectionist of a brain is saying, and simply say I am disappointed. I thought I had a great plan … [Tell me more…]
Breaking up in a BDSM power exchange dynamic can be particularly challenging due to the unique emotional, psychological, and structural elements of the relationship. These breakups often feel more difficult for all involved. This is noticeable as part of what makes these relationships so special, is the depths and expansiveness of where they reach. Power … [Tell me more…]
Navigating BDSM social and, in My case, a professional space often requires interaction with a wide range of people, groups, and organizations. From event hosts, to start-up kinky ventures and community acquaintances to people you may not particularly like, the world is full of diverse personalities. However, the notion that being polite and maintaining a … [Tell me more…]
i had just finished getting ready for bed when Mistress came into the room and asked me if i had enough energy to have some fun. Even if i was much more tired than i was, the answer would have still been an automatic and enthusiastic “Yes!” “Good” Mistress said “A deal has been struck … [Tell me more…]
Hierarchy. Reading the simple noun alone might elicit a physical and automatic reaction. Did it for you? For some people, the hatred for hierarchy runs deep. Despite that, we see hierarchies play out every day in our vanilla lives. Hierarchies often play a part to determine an individual’s or group’s status, privilege, and access to … [Tell me more…]
This year I will be double d20s! I entered the kink community nearly 20 years ago as a student and observer and stand now as a kinky lifestyle educator. I still love to chronicle my transition from mundane to the marvelous Mistress I see reflected back in the mirror each day. To say I am … [Tell me more…]
Just like clockwork, every few months for the last decade or so, I’ll receive a message or comment like the one I was confronted with in person recently. It was disgust disguised as concern. I’ve seen it before…. I can’t believe someone like you still uses the word ‘sissy.’ The history of ‘sissy’ When I … [Tell me more…]
“I access my ‘Alpha’ pet side’ when needed during a scene,” I said to the class and their collective eyes widened in surprise. “So as a pet you are a Domme? Like issuing commands and such?” one submissive male asked with hesitation. “Yes depends on how we’re playing. I don’t always use words during that … [Tell me more…]